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Australia's most useless Christmas presents,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]
Useless Christmas presents - where to start? How about a $2 shop soap on the rope,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Tweety Pie socks for adults,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], chocolate for diabetics or a Great Dane puppy for unit dwellers?
Vast amounts of unwanted Christmas presents are in this moment collecting dust in cupboards all over the world, the toll of many years of thoughtless giving.
Commonly offered useless gifts include scented candles,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], cutesy-pie clothes that your children won't wear and massage cushions that don't massage properly but vibrate around the neck threatening to choke users. And that is only for starters.
Your say: Australia's most useless Chrismas presents
Many buy obscure electrical items about the premise that individuals would not buy them on their own,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], conveniently overlooking the truth that there's a reason for this. They do not want them!
Electric ice shavers,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], ice-cream makers and foot spas squeeze into this category and regularly top Choice magazine's useless presents list. Ditto for epilators (electronic hair removers) and aromatherapy diffusers. Another classic is the wine cooler. Many versions take 40 minutes to cool the wine - much quicker to place it within the fridge.
There are some cardinal rules of present buying. Never buy personal items for example items because they could be the wrong style,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], colour or fit. Never-ever give your unwanted Christmas presents as gifts to friends - aside from being rude,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you might well make the faux pas of returning it towards the original giver.
After considerable thought (much more than many people give their Christmas purchases) we now have settled on the following as the three most useless Christmas gifts for 2007
Allow it to be known to all men that not many women actually wear pink,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], fluffy slippers. A hairdresser recounts a Christmas when her father purchased pink,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], fluffy,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], battery-operated massage slippers for his wife and daughter. Walking in it was like walking on planks. Wondering what had possessed him although not attempting to offend,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the slippers were relegated to life-imprisonment in the wardrobe. A few years later the hairdresser heard an unusual noise emanating in the closet. Opening it with extreme care along with a cricket bat, she discovered the long-forgotten offenders of aesthetics had "gone off" (as if they weren't already). They were probably on the last legs (ouch).
Borat's great legacy to mankind is certainly probably the most useless Christmas presents of 2007 and retails at about $10-$15 a pop. A buddy received one like a personal gift last year coupled with the drunken courage and generosity to test it on (sans-clothes) at a ski lodge. It was a hilarious and exotic event for those attending. However, few have this sort of courage and the the fact is that many mankinis will never see daylight. It must also be noted that mankinis don't always bring joy around the world and are particularly inappropriate at The holiday season - they'll only scare the children. Save them for Halloween!
This gift is sooooo 1970s! Mums and grandmas accustomed to knit penis warmers within the Swinging Seventies,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], thinking it quite amusing and risqué. Maybe it was risqué 4 decades ago (although I doubt it),[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], now it is quite simply passé,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], as well as useless. A fast survey of males has revealed they rarely, if ever,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], wear penis warmers,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], nor would they wear one if given one tomorrow. Some advice for those who have already taken the plunge and knitted or purchased one of these abominations for Christmas 2007: the more generous ones can probably double as Christmas stockings and the smaller ones as potpourri bags.
Useless Christmas gifts of the future
As if there weren't enough utterly useless Christmas gifts available on the market, one reader offers the following idea for avid marketers in Christmas 2008:
"You understand how on rainy days parking infringement notices become saturated under your wiper blade,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]? This 'new' device clips for your wiper on rainy days and provides secure dry storage for parking infringement notices,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]. No more soggy infringement notices,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]!"
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